Fucking Unicorn

Fucking Unicorn wanted a wig that they would sometimes break. This could be considered a curious idea, to most, but not to the Unicorn, who thought that it was in fact, simply life. A wig was the item that was opted for.

Fucking Unicorn often carried a helmet that they would occasionally watch for 10 minutes every morning. It would have been a fairly unusual suggestion, to you and me, but not to the Unicorn, who felt that it was in fact, sublime. Remarkably, a helmet was the chosen thing.

Fucking Unicorn desperately desired a piece of paper that they sometimes try to balance on their head. This seems to be an exciting approach to life, to you and me, but not to the Unicorn, who had come to the conclusion it was epic. Remarkably, a piece of paper would be the item that was chosen.

Fucking Unicorn desperately wanted a custard pie to insert somewhere. This seems a different activity, to me and my parents, but not to the Unicorn, who thinks it was sublime. Who would have imagined, a custard pie would be the thing that was selected.

Fucking Unicorn desperately needed a lava lamp that they would cuddle. It was considered to be a fairly astonishing idea, to me and my children, but not to the Unicorn, who felt that this idea was exciting. Bizarrely, a lava lamp would be the item that was selected.

Fucking Unicorn desired a stretchman that they sometimes smash. It would be a funny thought, to my mum, but not to the Unicorn, who felt that it was in fact, miraculous. Remarkably, a stretchman is the item to select.