Learn to walk away when love is not being served.
Love is not narcissistic or egocentric. Infact, love is respect, it is compromission, understanding, patience and acceptance. If you find yourself in a situation where your partner doesn't serve give any of these then it is not love.
Have you ever thought of skipping today without calling him? Not actually being the first to apologize during an argument this time around? Would he call you when he notices you haven't? Will she put her pride down and apologize if you didn't? Will he or she walk away because you told them the things they so that hurt you? If the answer to any of these is NO! Then be rest assured the other person is not in love with you.
What about situations where the other person doesn't care about your growth, your happiness or discomfort themselves sometimes just to see a smile on your face? Or do things before your very eye that would hurt you? Or even situations where she makes you her money bag and never give even a little gift to you or he only decides to love you behind closed doors, during sex and keeps you as his dirty little secret? That is simply not love.
Perhaps at this point you should walk away, give them the time to decide if it's you they really want and give yourself time to think if you really want to be treated that way. We would all advice a loved one to walk away if they ever fall into any of these but most times find it hard to walk out when we are in this very situation.
And most times we forget the emotional and psychological torture that comes with choosing to love a person who I'll treats us. It's okay to walk away when you don't get the kind of love you deserve, it's their loss and not yours. How are you ever going to be with someone who treats you better if you don't let go off someone who doesn't? It may seem hard, even the thought of living without them scared you but you'll be glad you did.
Awesome post @michellesamson. It is something people need to be reminded of. Love is reciprocating and if it isn't you do need to look at your situation and ask yourself, why you're still there. Male or female it makes not difference.
Exactly. If you don't get what you give in return then it's torture and not love. Thanks for stopping by.😊
This is so true...
I was in love with a girl who did nothing for me. I helped her through a depression, I've called her when she was down, I helped her find a new and better job, I defended her from people who were being mean to her... I did everything I could to show I cared for her.
How has she paid back? By walking away and moving to her new job without even sending a message. Not even an e-mail. She just left, as if I don't even exist.
Well, good riddance, then. I don't need soul-sucking leeches in my life.
Thanks for your article, which I found after reading @nonsowrites's entry in the Pay It Forward
There was once this guy who came forward and I wanted to know him better. Just in few days time he was acting like he already owned me just because I tried to be nice to him. That is what I do with everyone else but this guy thought being nice means submission. Why, no! But I also do not have to be a bitch just to send my message across. Anyway, he came to the point of questioning me as to why I did not reply to his message immediately. Why, not two hours has passed and as if I have to keep watching and answering his messages when I am busy at work? I once temporarily deactivated my Facebook account for a different reason and he accussed me of blocking him off. How could these too petty and too shallow matters be a cause of debate? I dumped him. I do not need anyone to choke me to death.
Good article you have there. I agree there are times we have to walk away. As they say, walking away does not mean you are weak. It means you are strong enough to stand up on your own and keep your self-respect.
I came across your article through @nonsowrites who featured it in his post as an entry to the Pay it Forward Curation Contest. This contest is open to everyone so you are also welcome to join.
Love is the simplest thing in the world yet, we over-complicate it perhaps as rather than be open, we restrict and set limitation. We can walk away if we don't get what we want or stay, even if we don't but, what if that is all they have to give?
Interesting write up, thanks :)
If that's all they have to give then it's the choice of the other person to decide if getting hurt is what they really want from love.
Hola @michellesamson, muy buena pregunta.
llegue a tu publicacion por la entrada de @nonsowrites en el concurso semana 22 - Pay It Forward organizado por @pifc.
Este comentario de @trincowski, me hizo reir.
Ahahahhhahhhah!
jajajajaja, hay muchas ingratas, un abrazo.
Exactamente. No hay sanguijuelas chupando sangre. Gracias por pasar.
Been there, done that... sadly.
Unfortunately, there were children involved and the courts don't understand narcissistic abuse. But I got out anyway - at great cost to me. There came a point when I understood that it was damaging my sons as well. That's when we got out. They've had to finish their childhood with him, unfortunately, but that's another story.
BTW, in the last paragraph, the word should be "ill" not "I'll"
Great post - I found you from @nonsowrites's Pay-It-Forward entry.
One of the hardest things in life is detaching from some you care about. It's hard to explain to someone in love the nees to leave when they don't understand why or choose not to. Don't you have that friend who is always complaining about her boyfriend but still doesn't break-up or move forward? That's just a typical case of people not knowing what to do with their feelings. They are hurt, they feel unappreciated but still cannot move, but it it is too late.
People know when love is not being reciprocated, I have friends like that and I have been there too. Sometimes it's the fear of no longer having the person and fear of not being able to move on that holds us back but I can say from my own experience that moving on gets easier everyday and it's better than holding on to the person who hurts you or chooses not to love you in return.
Understand the feeling :) Hard to walk away even someone doesn't deserve your time. It always difficult at the first step!
Yea. But you know eventually that you'll have to take that step no matter how hard you may feel it is at first.
Good advice in here for the young who get caught up in bad relationships. Also the old if they haven't figured this out yet. Thanks I found this post cause @nonsowrites featured you in the PIFC post.
Oh! Thanks for stopping by to check it out. I appreciate.
I cpuldn't agree more wirh everything you said in this post @michellesamson 😉
Perhaps we mistaken between love and lust😊 people said there's so many level of love. I was someone who doesn't believe in this kind of attachment to someone so bad. Love is a wonderful thing that's happened in my life, heart broken is an inspiration to continued life but if to enjoy my life I have to walk away from a person who doesn't deserve my compassion.. I'll take that way☺ I'll find some other one later.
Thanks God that I already find the love of my life. Thank you for sharing this, this is what people need to realize about how the relationship should be done.
Wow. I'm happy for you, thanks for commenting.