My Fucking Elf

My Fucking Elf desperately wanted a chocolate bar that they sometimes hug. It is considered to be a peculiar thing to do, to me, my mum and my dad, but not to the Elf, who feels that the idea was breathtaking. Who would have thought, a chocolate bar would be the item chosen.

My Fucking Elf owned a cucumber that they sometimes put down their trousers. It is a fairly surprising operation, to many, but not to the Elf, who expected it would be entertaining. A cucumber being the chosen thing.

My Fucking Elf owned a painting of a melon that they would occasionally play with. This might appear to be an unusual approach to life, to most, but not to the Elf, who had decided that this idea is exciting. Strangely, a painting of a melon is the item that was chosen.

My Fucking Elf desperately looked for a chocolate bar that they would sometimes sit and look at. This is certainly a fairly different operation, to me and my parents, but not to the Elf, who had come to the conclusion that this idea is sublime. You wouldnt have thought, a chocolate bar is the thing to choose.

My Fucking Elf always carried a cheese grater to embrace. It should have been a strange proposal, to me and my husband, but not to the Elf, who expected that this idea was stunning. Strangely, a cheese grater being the thing opted for.

My Fucking Elf desperately looked for a block of cheese that they liked to put on his head. It was considered to be an exciting activity, to you and me, but not to the Elf, who assumed that this idea is simply life. Who would have imagined, a block of cheese would be the item that was selected.