The Gentle Newt

The Gentle Newt always kept a can of Tango that they liked to put on his head. This seems to be a fairly weird and wonderful idea, to my neighbour, but not to the Newt, who had come to the conclusion that this idea was breathtaking. You wouldnt have thought, a can of Tango would be the item that was selected.

The Gentle Newt desired a dildo to cuddle. It might be a fairly peculiar suggestion, to you and me, but not to the Newt, who feels it was wonderful. Bizarrely, a dildo would be the chosen thing.

The Gentle Newt wanted a hat that they would throw. It should have been a fairly original approach to life, to me and my parents, but not to the Newt, who assumed that this idea was wonderful. Who would have imagined, a hat of all things.

The Gentle Newt desperately desired a porno magazine that they would occasionally sit and look at. It would be a fairly weird and wonderful exercise, to my grandpa, but not to the Newt, who expected that it was in fact, epic. Bizarrely, a porno magazine would be the chosen thing.

The Gentle Newt desperately desired a set square that they sometimes put on his head. It was considered to be a peculiar operation, to me and my children, but not to the Newt, who thought that it was in fact, sublime. Strangely, a set square would be the item that was selected.

The Gentle Newt desperately needed a condom that they would sometimes watch for 10 minutes every morning. This might appear to be a fairly original exercise, to my grandpa, but not to the Newt, who felt it would be awe-inspring. You wouldnt have imagined, a condom would be the thing that was chosen.