His Retarded Santa

His Retarded Santa desperately wanted a bottle of coke that they would sometimes put on his head. It was a fairly different undertaking, to everybody you know, but not to the Santa, who had come to the conclusion that this idea was out of this world. You wouldnt have thought, a bottle of coke is the thing to choose.

His Retarded Santa wanted a cup that they would sometimes put down their trousers. It was a curious approach to life, to me, my mum and my dad, but not to the Santa, who felt that the idea was wonderful. Bizarrely, a cup was the chosen item.

His Retarded Santa desperately needed a pint of cider that they would occasionally put down their trousers. It was considered to be a fairly weird and wonderful activity, to my grandpa, but not to the Santa, who had decided that this idea is awesome. Who would have imagined, a pint of cider is the thing to select.

His Retarded Santa owned a bag of poop that they sometimes embrace. One might consider this to be a fairly bizarre suggestion, to me and my children, but not to the Santa, who assumed that it was in fact, exciting. Remarkably, a bag of poop is the thing to opt for.

His Retarded Santa often carried a Harry Potter wand that they would experiment on. It was a fairly different idea, to my grandma, but not to the Santa, who thinks that it was in fact, epic. You wouldnt have thought, a Harry Potter wand is the thing to select.

His Retarded Santa found a sack of potatoes that they would often watch for 10 minutes every morning. It is an original proposal, to me, my mum and my dad, but not to the Santa, who had decided that the idea was entertaining. A sack of potatoes is the item to select.