The Bum Loving Ogre

The Bum Loving Ogre desperately searched for a can of coke that they would sometimes cuddle. This seems to be an astonishing exercise, to most, but not to the Ogre, who assumed that it was in fact, miraculous. Remarkably, a can of coke was the item that was selected.

The Bum Loving Ogre always had with them a condom that they would sometimes demolish. It would be a fairly exciting activity, to my neighbour, but not to the Ogre, who felt it would be spectacular. Who would have imagined, a condom being the chosen item.

The Bum Loving Ogre carried a bottle of wine that they sometimes worship. This seems a fairly bizarre activity, to many, but not to the Ogre, who had decided that this idea was breathtaking. Bizarrely, a bottle of wine is the item to opt for.

The Bum Loving Ogre looked for a rubber johnny that they would smash. It should have been a fairly astonishing idea, to me, my mum and my dad, but not to the Ogre, who considered it was miraculous. You wouldnt have imagined, a rubber johnny was the thing that was chosen.

The Bum Loving Ogre desperately looked for a spade to hug. It is considered to be a fairly strange approach to life, to everybody you know, but not to the Ogre, who feels it was miraculous. Remarkably, a spade was the thing that was selected.

The Bum Loving Ogre desperately wanted a pint of cider that they sometimes put in the bath with him. It is a fairly odd approach to life, to most, but not to the Ogre, who had decided that this idea is spectacular. Who would have thought, a pint of cider of all things.